Weakness

OK, so today at work we were talking about our weaknesses during our very long lunch break. Most of the people I work with said that cigarettes are their weakness, which really didn't surprise me cause most of my co-workers are smokers. When it came to me I was honest, I said Booze and Boys. Everyone seemed rather shocked by this revelation, they all think I'm a saint. I'm OK with this because my life outside of work is none of their business.

But this really got me thinking about my weaknesses and whether or not I have other ones. The answer would be NO. I can resist most things and say no to most things, food has never been an issue for me nor have the normal vices like weed and cigarettes. But put me in a room with a 24 and a cutie and I wont say no.

I'm trying really hard to stop drinking but its proving a lot harder then I thought. Mostly because i like to drink, scratch that I LOVE to drink. Its not that I really need it, but I enjoy having a beer or a glass of wine with my dinner and I like going out with friends for drinks. I don't drink to excess though, I'm very cautious of that. I just enjoy booze far too much to ever really give it up completely.

My other weakness of boys is BAD one. I can't say no to a guy, especially if I find him attractive. I was boy crazy when I was a little girl and as an adult I'm still boy crazy, in fact I'm pretty sure its gotten worse over the years.

Now combine my two weaknesses together and we have a disaster waiting to happen.
Drunk me + Boy Crazy me = BAD BAD BAD BAD THINGS!

Normally though I don't worry about it much due in part to the fact that usually when I drink with guys, they're my friends and I may flirt but that's it. I would never take it to the next level. However...in 3 weeks times I will be in Brandon for the weekend visiting a friend, and there will be bar's and drinking involved. I worry about myself in a somewhat unfamiliar place because I may make and ass of myself or worse. But alas I found a way to make sure I don't do anything stupid. I call her Chelsea Kumka. She's my best friend and she said she would look out for me and I made her promise "Not to let me do stupid things with ugly people." She will help me say no to the boys, and well its Brandon who says no to Booze in Brandon.

So there you have it...I have only two true weaknesses....and they both start with B's.
Boys and Booze = Love.
Boys and Booze and Brandon = I hope I don't do anything stupid.

Colon Cleanse!

OK so just an update...I've decided to delay the Colon Cleanse. The month of February is kinda busy for me, with lots of social outings where drinking and bad food will be involved. I see no point in doing the cleanse to just screw it all over 4 weekends in a row.

So I will be doing my Colon Cleanse in MARCH. I will still inform you all of how it goes.

I have decided to do a colon cleanse. A close friend of mine who is very fitness minded suggested I try one to help jump start my weight-loss and to improve my over all wellbeing. So upon his suggestion I went and purchased a Herbal based one, why herbal? Well I’m very leery of how pumping my body full of chemicals is supposed to help clean in out, that and I try and follow an organic diet. I also choose free range for all my meats and eggs.

The product I chose is ReCleanse Herbal Cleanse. The girl in the store said its very mild and it wont give you the shits. She also said that it comes with a meal plan to help the process and at only $19.00 it seemed like something worth trying so I bought it.

Getting home I took out the little brochure and read all the information and checked out the meal plan. Not gonna lie at first I was VERY scared of trying this because the meal plan had me cutting out some of my favorite foods and eating foods with names I can’t pronounce. But I am determined to make this work, even if I'm not allowed any breads, cereals, or pastas for a whole week.

I’ve sat down today and made my self a simple plan to follow for the full 7 days. I planned out all 3 of my meals and my two snacks for the whole week, by doing this I’m making things a lot easier on myself. There are a lot of repeated things, which I am ok with, especially for breakfast and snacks. I also made my self a shopping list so that on Saturday I can go to the grocery store and get everything I will need for the week. I also plan on doing a lot of prep on Sunday for the week so that I don’t have to get up early in the morning to make things.

I will be posting a blog after my first 3-4 days and again at the end of it. I’m really hoping that this will work the way I want it to. Some things I’m hoping will change are; Weight-loss, less cravings, more energy, better concentration, and most of all overall wellbeing.

If your interested in learning more about the product I’ve chosen you can check out their website www.recleanse.com it also has lots of awesome recipes that are recommended post cleanse to prolong the effects of the cleanse.

Happy Birthday.....Maybe

I consider myself to be a very good friend. I am there for my friends when ever they need me, I celebrate their birthdays and other big occasions with them when needed. Thankfully my friends do the same for me. I will drop most anything if one of my good friends truly needs me, mostly because these people have been there for me through a lot of crazy ass things in my life.

Recently, a close friend of mine got in a fight with another friend of hers. It was over the date she choose to do something for her birthday. The two have been best friends for well over 7 years, at which point you would think they would know each others birthday. I common courtesy I give to all my friends is that the weekend of their birthday I make sure to be free so that we can go out and celebrate together. If I'm unsure if they will do it the weekend before for after I simply ask.

I don't understand how someone can claim to be your 'Best Friend' and then forget which weekend your birthday day is, better yet how said person can get mad at you for then plans you made cause they already had plans. It just seems so selfish to me. I make the effort to be around for all my friends birthdays, and if for some reason I can't be I find a way to make it up.

I know it seems like I'm making a huge deal out of a simple birthday, but they mean a lot to me. I think birthdays are very, very important. Getting to spend the night with your friends celebrating another year you have been alive seems like a big deal to me. You never know when your last birthday will be so I say why not make each one count?

Rest In Peace...

Grief never ends but it changes
it is a passage not a place to stay
the sense of loss must give way
if were to value the life that was lived

That passage has got me through more tough times then I can even remember. I have no clue who wrote it, I have searched the internet far and wide and everything I find lists it as Author Unknown.
That however means nothing. I first heard this verse when I was 16 in mid October 2004, just a few days after my brother had passed away. My Uncle Keith had found it and we used it on the card that was handed out at Scott's Memorial.

Recently a close friend of mine lost her Father, a sadness I hope to never feel but I am realistic that one day it will happen. I wrote the passage out in a 'Sorry for your loss' card and added the note "This got me through Scott, Nonno, and Dillan. I can only hope it will help you with your Father." A few days later she called me and said that she remembered reading the verse on the card at Scott's memorial, she thanked me for reminding her that you can't stay sad forever.

That is the exact message I think it should convey. Losing people happens, death is one of the few guarantees of life, the two go hand in hand. I've lost a lot people in my life, more than any 22 year girl should have. The one thing I always remember is that the sadness of grief is not a forever thing, you have to move on and keep living. I'm not saying its instant, not by the least. It took me well over 3 years to fully come to terms with my brothers death. I dealt with it in a way I would never recommend. But when I was learning to deal with his death in a non drug riddled way, every single day I repeated that passage. Every single day for almost 2 years straight, and it worked.

I wouldn't be where I am today if I never heard that passage, I probably wouldn't even be alive to tell you the truth, but I am. So to any one who has lost a loved one or someone close to you, just repeat it, as often as you need. Remember that you can't stay grieving forever, you need to move on and value the memories you do have with that person.

NEW BLOG!! WOOT

Ok, so this is my new blog. and by new I mean the only one I've ever written. Upon a suggestion from a friend who said I should post some of the stuff I've written, I created this pretty in pink blog. I choose pink cause its fun.


I have already posted a piece I wrote a while back for a friends e-zine. It never did get published but I think its good. 90% of the things I write are my opinions views and the like of things that surround us in everyday life. I've been told on many occasions that my perception of things is both amusing and informative. I will make you think about things you never thought.


I hope you like it and if you don't....Eff you. I don't really give a crappola what you think.

The Dynamics of a Bed Buddy

Bed Buddies, Fuck Friends, Friends with Benefits, or my personal favorite Romantic Friends.

Whatever the term you use they all boil down to the same thing: two people who aren’t dating and have no interest in dating each other but still have sex.

Personally I’ve had several romantic friends….some worked out really great; some on the other hand were totally disastrous. Now you ask; why were they so horrible? It’s simple really; they didn’t fit with the rules. Now these rules are my own personal rules and I have found them to be HIGHLY affective in having a successful romantic friend’s relationship. These rules may not be right for you; you may find that some parts have to be changed to work for you.

THE RULES

#1 –FULL DISCLOSURE.

This one is the most important. By this I mean about EVERYTHING. First and foremost, is past partners and STI testing. When I decide to take a new romantic friend I’m honest with them about the number of people I have hooked up with and I’m also honest with them about any possible STI’s and I expect the same from them. I also expect them to have regular STI testing, and because we live in Canada you can go to your doc and get it done and it costs nothing. I don’t want to put myself at risk so yes I am picky with the cleanliness of those I hook up with. Now full disclosure doesn’t only apply to the physical aspect, it also works with emotions. I’m honest with my intentions when acquiring a new romantic friend and I expect the same in return. The deal is that if either of us starts to develop real feelings for each other we tell them. Honesty is the best policy in this case, because should it happen we deal with it at the time, who knows maybe our sex could develop into something real…..who am I kidding that wont happen to me.

#2 – PROTECTION

Again, this is a very, very important rule and connects directly to rule #1. I always use condoms and the pill when I have a romantic friend on the go. As much as I hate condoms they are necessary, I don’t want an STI nor do I want a baby. And I’m pretty sure the guy I’m having sex with doesn’t want one either….at least not with me that’s why were just fucking and not in a real relationship.

#3 – THE FRIEND CLAUSE

Romantic Friends aren’t actually friends. I find it easiest to have a guy who is outside my circle of friends, someone that no one really knows or talks to. Having sex regularly with a friend can make things awkward, unless you’re both amazing actors. Most people can’t hide the fact that they’ve slept with someone when their around them, it’s like part of human nature. I’m good at it though, actually scarily good. But I have yet to find a guy who’s anywhere near my level. Thus I don’t do romantic friends with people are actually my friends. Things just get messy and weird, especially when your other friends find out.

#4 – PROXIMITY and LOGISTICS

There are a lot of logistics involved with romantic friends. Like how close they live, if they have their own place or vehicle. I don’t have fuck buddies outside the city limits. I’ve done it once or twice for guys who were amazingly hot and amazing in bed…but in the end the distance really killed it. I don’t want to drive an hour for an hour of sex and then drive back…..that takes three hours, I like hook ups to be less time consuming, unless all three of those hours are spent fucking. I also don’t have ones that don’t have their own mode of transportation, I’m not going drive all the time for sex, especially if I can get it somewhere else and not have to work so hard. I prefer guys who have their own place, cause I live with my parents and the makes casual sex kind of hard. Not that I don’t enjoy some fun on a dirt road in the back seat, but I prefer indoors.

#5 - ATTRACTION

This is short and simple…you can’t have a romantic friend you’re not attracted to. You can try really hard but it never works. You have to be physically attracted to the person your fucking otherwise the sex will in no way be enjoyable.

#6 – INVISIBILTY

I know odd title but it makes sense. Your romantic friend should be pretty much invisible in your life; your parents should never meet him. My parents have met a whole ONE of my romantic friends and that’s because he was a family friend to begin with and that was a short lived disaster. They didn’t actually know of course. But still, the fact remains the same don’t tell people about the guy, don’t introduce him to your parents as a friend. Just keep him to your self and have fun with him.

Well there you have it; those are my simple and easy to follow rules for having a successful casual sex based relationship.